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  La Solución Final contra las actualizaciones de Windows 10.  
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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 20:07   #1
Multicuneta
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Sep 2017 | 1.224 Mens.

Abr 2014 | 11.751 Mens.

La Solución Final contra las actualizaciones de Windows 10.

Lo dejo pegado en inglés, luego cuando tenga un rato lo traduzco al español.

This is the Final Solution
Completely remove the windows update service, and reinstating it only when I want to update.

Removing (destroying the living fuck out of the stubbon piece of shit that MS calls) the windows update service:

open the start menu and without doing anything else, start typing in "services.msc". a search should happen automatically, and should give only one result - an entry called "Services", with a bunch of blue gears for an icon. Select it.

scroll down the list of services, looking for Windows Update. Once you find it, right click on it and select Stop. Now you'd think this would be enough, right? Stopping windows update service and disabling task scheduler entries and the like. No, windows is a fucking cunt, and will somehow manage to re-activate the damn thing. Found out the hard way, computer restarted itself when I was in the kitchen making myself lunch and all my work was gone. Plus, chrome/firefox doesn't restore private browsing/incognito tabs, for good reason. I had a few important tabs open in chrome/firefox incognito as separate sessions. Great, fuck you windows. Anyway.

navigate to %windir%\system32 (if you're unsure, paste that into the address bar of File Explorer). On most installs, this folder is C:\Windows\system32.

find the file wuaueng.dll. This is the windows automatic update service.

right click on it. select properties. under the Security tab, you should see a bunch of listboxes and at the bottom, a line that reads "For special permissions or advanced settings, click Advanced". Next to that, is a button labelled Advanced. Click on it. A new dialog box should open. In this new dialog box, there should be two lines of text at the top, labelled Name and Owner. Name will look something like this: C:\Windows\System32\wuautoappupdate.dll. Owner will list the current account that owns the rights to this file. It is likely to be TrustedInstaller. Now, click on the word "Change" next to it. A new dialog will pop up, titled "Select User or Group".

now, there will be a couple of greyed out text boxes, and one that is labelled "Enter the object name to select (examples):". Here, you will want to type "Administrators" or, if you know your windows username, type in your windows username. Now, click on "Check Names". Your text should be formatted with an underline and with the correct prefix automatically. (If you get an error message, try googling on guides or tools to help you "take ownership of a file". when you successfully take ownership, consider this step complete). click OK on the "Select User or Group" dialog box. Now you should be at the "Security Settings for wuaueng.dll" dialog box. Check that the "Owner" has changed hands. Now, click OK to return to the original dialog box (wuaueng.dll Properties), and then click OK on that again. You should not have any dialog boxes remaining.

again, find the file wuaueng.dll. This is the windows automatic update service.

right click on it. select properties. under the Security tab, you should see a list of usernames, followed by "To change permissions, click Edit". on the right of that line of text, you should see an "Edit" button. click on it. a new dialog box should open. in this new dialog box, you will see a list of usernames. you should see something like:

Authenticated Users
SYSTEM
Administrators (blabla)
Users (blablabla)

Click on whichever group includes the account you are currently using. Usually, this is the Administrators group. Once you have clicked on your group, move down to the second dialog box. It should contain multiple entries such as

Full control
Modify
Read & execute
Read
Write
Special Permissions

you will want to select the "Allow" checkbox under the "Full control" entry. if you aren't able to move/cut the file in a later step, this is the part that went wrong. try repeating these steps, but for the Users group as well.

click OK, and the dialog box will close.

click OK on the original dialog box.

CTRL+X/CTRL+V (cut-paste/drag-drop/move) the .dll file to somewhere else on your computer. don't forget where you put it, you'll need to copy it back in place when you want to update windows. you should update - bug/security patches are important. you're just removing all possibility for windows 10 to fuck up your day ever again (FUCK YOU WINDOWS 10, FUCK YOU).

open up services.msc again. scroll down to Windows Update. if the "description" entry now reads something like <Failed to Read Description. Error Code: 2>, congratulations, you have successfully banished windows update into the shadow realm. Fuck you windows 10.

Bringing her back from the dead:

put the file back in system32. perform the updates immediately (do not leave the windows update file permissions in that state for too long! it's a potential security risk/loophole if you accidentally download and execute malware in the meantime.). once the update is done, immediately banish the fucking piece of shit back into the shadow realm where it belongs.


Fuente: noggin_noodle

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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 20:08   #2
longboard
Listo, que eres un listo
 
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Oct 2005 | 36.033 Mens.
Lugar: teniente

Vale sí, soy feo, pero...

Putas actualizaciones, siempre se cargan algo.

@Sr.Rubio me cago en tu estampa, so cochambroso (por si acaso)
PLATAFORMA OFICIAL FORETI Nº de Socio CB (Mascota Oficial) ///
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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 20:08   #3
VonRichthofen
r3db4r0n
 
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Jun 2019 | 1.076 Mens.

Nov 2007 | 7.202 Mens.

patada y al arcen

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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 20:10   #4
elPichichi
Pichichi
 
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Feb 2015 | 2.875 Mens.
Lugar: Cosmos psicodélico

Uno a pedale

Me viene de lujo. Estos inutiles se cargan mi portatil cada vez que entra alguna actualización.
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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 20:10   #5
chapuzon
Miembro Viril.
 
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Feb 2015 | 7.678 Mens.
Lugar: LaLuna
Basura de tutorial para ignorantes. Lo bonito es que te entren las de seguridad pero no las de versión. Para ello, plantillas administrativas.

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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 20:11   #6
rokkko
Viva Piñata
 
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Ene 2009 | 17.957 Mens.

Mar 2003 | 8.124 Mens.

LTSC y a campeonar

Mi avatar no me define, ni me trato de un muslime.
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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 20:11   #7
djbolas
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Nov 2006 | 4.335 Mens.
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FiaT Stilo 1.9Multijet Racingggg

Usa linux, asi no tienes actualizaciones de windows

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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 20:12   #8
Pablo Type R
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May 2003 | 41.878 Mens.
Lugar: Madrid / Ourense

Accord 1.8 LS VTEC '99 y Jazz 1.4 Graphite '06

Cita:
Originalmente Escrito por chapuzon Ver Mensaje
Basura de tutorial para ignorantes. Lo bonito es que te entren las de seguridad pero no las de versión. Para ello, plantillas administrativas.
Además de vanagloriarte podías compartir cómo se hace.

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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 20:15   #9
Eduard_Khil
Trololololl
 
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Abr 2019 | 2.265 Mens.
es mas directo borrar el system32
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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 20:25   #10
e_daniel_chapa
ForoCoches: Miembro
 
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Jun 2012 | 2.309 Mens.
Cita:
Originalmente Escrito por Eduard_Khil Ver Mensaje
es mas directo borrar el system32
Y si supieran que la mayoria de virus se guardan en esa carpeta... mano de santo borrarla

Peña Valencianista nº393
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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 20:26   #11
Multicuneta
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Sep 2017 | 1.224 Mens.

Abr 2014 | 11.751 Mens.

Cita:
Originalmente Escrito por rokkko Ver Mensaje
LTSC y a campeonar
uso LTSC en todos mis dispositivos! pero sigue buscando y haciendo cosas en segundo plano

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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 20:27   #12
NeoCimek
Cyborg*****
 
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Abr 2017 | 13.661 Mens.
Lugar: Mundos de Yupi

VW Lykan

No actualizar
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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 20:27   #13
elPichichi
Pichichi
 
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Feb 2015 | 2.875 Mens.
Lugar: Cosmos psicodélico

Uno a pedale

Lo acabo de hace y todo ok. Al reiniciar y volver a encender hace unas cosas el PC con el Windows Update y luego funciona con normalidad.
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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 20:28   #14
neothot
ForoCoches: Miembro
 
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May 2004 | 3.475 Mens.
Lugar: Galicia.
Las actualizaciones pueden ser una lata, sobre todo porque se instalan sin avisar, pero posponerlas puede provocar problemas, sobre todo de seguridad.
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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 20:28   #15
octaviaa
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Oct 2006 | 8.176 Mens.
Lugar: España

fabia

Poniendo la conexión a internet de uso medido, las paras casi todas.
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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 20:29   #16
qdm
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Sep 2004 | 13.512 Mens.
a mi me está jodiendo una ahora, falla y vuelta a empezar todos los dias.
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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 20:32   #17
lunnoman
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Jul 2017 | 748 Mens.
Lugar: Valencia

Focus TDCI

Pillo sitio para impedir la 1903...

Me está jodiendo la vida...
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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 20:35   #18
Zor_Raimunda
Forocoches: Miembro 30 cm
 
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Ene 2010 | 3.650 Mens.
Lugar: Fukushima
Cita:
Originalmente Escrito por rokkko Ver Mensaje
LTSC y a campeonar
This
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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 20:39   #19
Jastik 3.0
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Jul 2017 | 2.519 Mens.
Lugar: A Coruña / Finlandia

Ene 2007 | 21.000 Mens.

Yo desde que borré la carpeta entera de System32 no he vuelto a tener ningun problema.
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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 20:40   #20
emiypilu
ForoVox: Afiliado ✅
 
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Mar 2009 | 1.341 Mens.
Nunca he tenido ningún problema con Windows 10
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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 21:37   #21
lofarcio
ForoCoches: Miembro
 
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May 2019 | 720 Mens.

Yaris híbrido

Cita:
Originalmente Escrito por Multicuneta Ver Mensaje
Lo dejo pegado en inglés, luego cuando tenga un rato lo traduzco al español.

This is the Final Solution
Completely remove the windows update service, and reinstating it only when I want to update.

Removing (destroying the living fuck out of the stubbon piece of shit that MS calls) the windows update service:

open the start menu and without doing anything else, start typing in "services.msc". a search should happen automatically, and should give only one result - an entry called "Services", with a bunch of blue gears for an icon. Select it.

scroll down the list of services, looking for Windows Update. Once you find it, right click on it and select Stop. Now you'd think this would be enough, right? Stopping windows update service and disabling task scheduler entries and the like. No, windows is a fucking cunt, and will somehow manage to re-activate the damn thing. Found out the hard way, computer restarted itself when I was in the kitchen making myself lunch and all my work was gone. Plus, chrome/firefox doesn't restore private browsing/incognito tabs, for good reason. I had a few important tabs open in chrome/firefox incognito as separate sessions. Great, fuck you windows. Anyway.

navigate to %windir%\system32 (if you're unsure, paste that into the address bar of File Explorer). On most installs, this folder is C:\Windows\system32.

find the file wuaueng.dll. This is the windows automatic update service.

right click on it. select properties. under the Security tab, you should see a bunch of listboxes and at the bottom, a line that reads "For special permissions or advanced settings, click Advanced". Next to that, is a button labelled Advanced. Click on it. A new dialog box should open. In this new dialog box, there should be two lines of text at the top, labelled Name and Owner. Name will look something like this: C:\Windows\System32\wuautoappupdate.dll. Owner will list the current account that owns the rights to this file. It is likely to be TrustedInstaller. Now, click on the word "Change" next to it. A new dialog will pop up, titled "Select User or Group".

now, there will be a couple of greyed out text boxes, and one that is labelled "Enter the object name to select (examples):". Here, you will want to type "Administrators" or, if you know your windows username, type in your windows username. Now, click on "Check Names". Your text should be formatted with an underline and with the correct prefix automatically. (If you get an error message, try googling on guides or tools to help you "take ownership of a file". when you successfully take ownership, consider this step complete). click OK on the "Select User or Group" dialog box. Now you should be at the "Security Settings for wuaueng.dll" dialog box. Check that the "Owner" has changed hands. Now, click OK to return to the original dialog box (wuaueng.dll Properties), and then click OK on that again. You should not have any dialog boxes remaining.

again, find the file wuaueng.dll. This is the windows automatic update service.

right click on it. select properties. under the Security tab, you should see a list of usernames, followed by "To change permissions, click Edit". on the right of that line of text, you should see an "Edit" button. click on it. a new dialog box should open. in this new dialog box, you will see a list of usernames. you should see something like:

Authenticated Users
SYSTEM
Administrators (blabla)
Users (blablabla)

Click on whichever group includes the account you are currently using. Usually, this is the Administrators group. Once you have clicked on your group, move down to the second dialog box. It should contain multiple entries such as

Full control
Modify
Read & execute
Read
Write
Special Permissions

you will want to select the "Allow" checkbox under the "Full control" entry. if you aren't able to move/cut the file in a later step, this is the part that went wrong. try repeating these steps, but for the Users group as well.

click OK, and the dialog box will close.

click OK on the original dialog box.

CTRL+X/CTRL+V (cut-paste/drag-drop/move) the .dll file to somewhere else on your computer. don't forget where you put it, you'll need to copy it back in place when you want to update windows. you should update - bug/security patches are important. you're just removing all possibility for windows 10 to fuck up your day ever again (FUCK YOU WINDOWS 10, FUCK YOU).

open up services.msc again. scroll down to Windows Update. if the "description" entry now reads something like <Failed to Read Description. Error Code: 2>, congratulations, you have successfully banished windows update into the shadow realm. Fuck you windows 10.

Bringing her back from the dead:

put the file back in system32. perform the updates immediately (do not leave the windows update file permissions in that state for too long! it's a potential security risk/loophole if you accidentally download and execute malware in the meantime.). once the update is done, immediately banish the fucking piece of shit back into the shadow realm where it belongs.


Fuente: noggin_noodle
A mí se me cae cuando intenta actualizar. 6 veces seguidas la pantallica azul (claro) de la muerte. Luego lo deja para otro rato y hasta la siguiente.

¿Vale esto que pones para evitarlo? - Ya he probado de todo.

Gracias.
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Viejo 08-nov-2019, 21:41   #22
krayne
Hardstyle Maniacs
 
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Jun 2018 | 3.085 Mens.
La mejor solución es no haber instalado esa basura y quedarse con el W7 que va como un tiro y no hay incompatibilidades de ningun tipo
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Viejo 09-nov-2019, 10:49   #23
Multicuneta
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Sep 2017 | 1.224 Mens.

Abr 2014 | 11.751 Mens.

Cita:
Originalmente Escrito por krayne Ver Mensaje
La mejor solución es no haber instalado esa basura y quedarse con el W7 que va como un tiro y no hay incompatibilidades de ningun tipo
Soy de los que piensa como tú, estaba tan contento con mi W7, pero en algún momento u otro toca actualizar.

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Viejo 09-nov-2019, 10:50   #24
MekaDragon
Wonder Boy
 
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May 2016 | 591 Mens.
Lugar: in Monster World.

Mazda3 2017 Skyactiv-G 2.0 165cv

Instalas GNU/Linux y al arcén.
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Viejo 09-nov-2019, 10:50   #25
KnC
Yo soy MaGgNuM
 
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Sep 2011 | 10.818 Mens.
Lugar: Barcelona

May 2003 | 13.824 Mens.

La solución real es no ser pobre y tener un pc digno.

Usuario Premium
Renovación automática: 21.05.2019
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Viejo 09-nov-2019, 10:51   #26
nieusUp!
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Feb 2017 | 5.170 Mens.
Lugar: Alacant

San Fernando TDI

A mí me joden con lo del disco 100% a alguien más le pasa?
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Viejo 09-nov-2019, 10:51   #27
Cuervorojo
Ansiedad
 
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Nov 2014 | 4.596 Mens.
Lugar: Al sur

4 años de carnet y aún tengo miedo de conducir

Cita:
Originalmente Escrito por chapuzon Ver Mensaje
Basura de tutorial para ignorantes. Lo bonito es que te entren las de seguridad pero no las de versión. Para ello, plantillas administrativas.
¿Puedes explicar en qué consiste eso shur?
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Viejo 09-nov-2019, 10:53   #28
Dublinia
ForoCoches: Miembro
 
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Jul 2019 | 611 Mens.
Cita:
Originalmente Escrito por chapuzon Ver Mensaje
Basura de tutorial para ignorantes. Lo bonito es que te entren las de seguridad pero no las de versión. Para ello, plantillas administrativas.
¿Cómo se hace eso? Sería la solución milagrosa para este cáncer de windows.
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Viejo 09-nov-2019, 10:55   #29
mundoloco
ForoCoches: Miembro
 
Oct 2018 | 336 Mens.
Ahora solo en castellano
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Viejo 09-nov-2019, 10:56   #30
chapuzon
Miembro Viril.
 
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Feb 2015 | 7.678 Mens.
Lugar: LaLuna
Cita:
Originalmente Escrito por Dublinia Ver Mensaje
¿Cómo se hace eso? Sería la solución milagrosa para este cáncer de windows.
Milagrosa

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